01.02.20

Hellooo February.

You know I had these shower thoughts today and I had so many epiphanies about a few things. I was reflecting heavily on my yoga practice. I wish I could record my shower thoughts cause I somehow always forget them.

Anyway, I’ve just gotten home from catching up with some friends. I really enjoy their company. We can cover a lot of topics and we have a good laugh.☺️

Yoga was pretty light today but it was exactly what I needed. I did a pretty good job with my diet today and I think I’m gonna sleep pretty well tonight. I got some free books on my phone. It’s on Stoicism and Taoism and I think I just wanna chill and read. Maybe study a bit of Korean. I’ve been listening to K-Pop to help me with my reading and to try and understand sentence structures better.

Three more days until I’ve reached 100 days of yoga. And just so happens, the day after my ex will arrive in Australia.

Look, if I’m being honest… there was one day this week where I thought about it a lot. I started to overthink. I was telling myself oh you need to prepare for certain scenarios and prepare for all posssibilities. I was like… what if we meet and she says she wants to get back together? What if she tells me she hates me? What if she just wants closure? What if she’s dating? What if she just really wants her stuff back? What if we don’t even meet? What if the corona virus gets really bad and they have to postpone their flight?

I told myself I had to prepare for all these situations and I got so tired thinking about it. I remember getting home from work that day and I sat down and I just started breathing. And I told myself to just let it go. I don’t have to think about it or prepare for a certain scenario. I will deal with whatever I need to deal with when the time comes. Because the truth is, I don’t know what will happen so it is just pointless trying to prepare for a million different possibilities.

I mean in an ideal situation, we’d choose to reconcile and get back together or just make peace but even I can’t think about that or fantasise too much about it because it’s just one of a million other possibilities and outcomes.

I just have to allow things to be. I have to let things unfold the way they’re supposed to. I don’t have to know everything right now because the truth and all the answers I’ll ever need will come at the right time.

♥️🧘🏽‍♀️

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